Using Spirituality To Heal Current Situations
Question from a reader:
That’s a really tough and complicated situation. At the most basic level, the only person you have any control over is yourself. So start there. You have to realize that you are not responsible for other people’s actions and emotions – only your own. In the grand scheme of things, you cannot change him or his perception of you. You can only heal yourself.
“How can I use my spirituality and new awareness to help heal my addiction and the friction it caused with the relationships in my life? Especially that of my ex husband who is the father of my two young children.
I know my mistakes and see the excuses I was making up for myself and I’ve tried to improve and repair his outlook on me but it’s just not going well. I am trying to be more positive, understanding, and compassionate but I miss my babies and want my ex and I to be able to co-parent together for our kids’ sake.”
I know that’s difficult especially when your children are involved, but the only way to truly be able to heal your relationship is to heal yourself. Be the change you wish to see, as it were.
No amount of attempting to improve his outlook is going to be effective, you can only be the person you are trying to convince him that you are and show him. He may accept this, he may not, and that’s something that you have to be prepared for, but by being unattached to the outcome, it takes the pressure off of you and releases feelings of desperation.
The irony is that finding peace with where you are will help move you to where you want to be.
The most practical thing I can suggest is going to therapy so that you can both work through your issues.