If you’ve been in spiritual circles for any amount of time, you’ve likely heard some form of the idea that we create our reality, and we manifest our experiences, and as such, we must take responsibility for ourselves and our experiences in order to create the outcomes we desire.
This concept becomes dangerously twisted, however, when applied to victims of abuse such as sexual harassment, sexual abuse, sexual assault, domestic violence, rape, and systemic oppression. That doesn’t stop many well-meaning spiritual people from using it to dismiss and otherwise invalidate the very real experiences of abuse victims. I’ve come across some form of it a lot over the course of my spiritual development, particularly in the early stages, including touting it as channeled information from spirit guides, etc.
At the time, I wasn’t educated enough on the subject to know better, and I took the word of psychics and channelers. Having had many years to grow in understanding and develop spiritually, I now realize how this is an over-simplification and only serves to damage and shame victims of abuse.
Some of the forms of this message have been:
Your souls contracted for this experience.
Your thoughts create your reality, therefore, your victim mentality created this situation.
There’s an energy exchange between abuser and the abused, and if the abused wasn’t putting out that kind of energy they wouldn’t attract this experience.
I’d like to break each one of these down and explain why this is misunderstood and damaging.
“Your souls contracted for this experience”
If soul contracts in these situations are such a thing, then the ONLY purpose I can see for them is that it is a contract to bring light to these dynamics so that they can be healed and ended. That does NOT mean that we simply dismiss it as “well you signed up for this” and forget about it. It means that it’s a contract between YOU and the people involved as well, and THEIR dynamic is meant to teach YOU empathy and what it means to protect the vulnerable.
“Your thoughts create your reality, therefore, your victim mentality created this situation”
As I’ve said before… a victim mentality only exists when the abuse is imaginary… but victim mentalities are often rooted in real trauma and abuse. In that case, we must go back to the source. A person’s first experience with abuse can never be the result of their own thoughts because the experience has never entered into their awareness.
Abusive experiences and patterns are ALMOST ALWAYS ancestral, handed down from one generation and inflicted onto the next. By simply incarnating into that ancestral line, one will experience that abuse. This, you might call a soul contract. But soul contracts are not only experiences, they are opportunities to heal. As an observer of that contract, you become a part of the collective contract and you are offered an opportunity to heal group karma that enables abusers through rape culture, systemic racism, and other destructive social climates.
By telling someone that they manifested their abuse, you are absolving the abuser of accountability, and thus AIDING in the manifestation of that experience.
“There’s an energy exchange between abuser and the abused, and if the the abused wasn’t putting out that kind of energy they wouldn’t attract this experience”
With regard to there being an energy exchange between abuser and the abused – what this really means is boundaries.
People can only abuse you if you continue to allow it, and often times that requires learning to uphold and maintain healthy boundaries. But many times, power dynamics make upholding boundaries extremely difficult. It’s called abuse because the person or group who has the the most power is using that power to abuse a person or group who has less of it. This, too, is ancestral, because the only way a person or group obtains more power than another is by accumulating it over time (the only exception being a parent/child dynamic in which case it exists from the moment the child is born).
Who allowed that person to accumulate that power, unchecked?
Who continues to enable them to wield that power without consequence?
The answer is the collective. The family members who don’t speak up or step in. The friends who never say anything. The “good” cops who don’t report the bad cops. The people who say “boys will be boys.” The well-to-do family who protects their sons and daughters from the consequences of their actions.
All of the people who see this abuse taking place and say nothing? They are just as responsible, because they allow abusers to avoid being held accountable.
You can’t tell someone that they’ve manifested their own oppression or abuse without pointing the finger at yourself for being a part of the collective that allowed it to happen.
So… let’s shut this toxic shit down wherever we see it. Okay?
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Those of you in my Facebook group or who follow my page may have joined me on Facebook Live along with my friend, Misty Pennington, as we participated in a full moon releasing ceremony a few weeks ago. The audio quality on that video didn’t turn out so well, so Misty shared a write up of her ceremony with us in the group. Misty and I are working on putting together some better quality videos and how-tos on releasing and intention ceremonies in the near future, so stay tuned for that.
We didn’t have time to get together this week to do that for the upcoming new moon on Saturday, so Misty wrote up a nice guest post on putting together your own ceremony for Saturday to manifest your intentions.
New Moon Manifestation Rituals
by Misty Pennington
In a follow-up to the Full Moon Ceremony earlier this month, it’s time to look at the next significant moon phase – the New Moon.
At the last full moon, we released and let go of heavy or dark thoughts, behaviors or emotions that we felt were holding us back from achieving our greatest/highest potential. The new moon is an ideal time to bring awareness and intention to the things that we want to invite into our life. New projects, new behaviors, plans, relationships, work, abundance; you get the picture!
The New Moon offers us a time of hope, a time of faith and renewal of our commitments. It’s the beginning of the next lunar cycle. A time to start anew.
What is is that you’d like to see come to fruition in your life this year? The new moon is a fertile place to start fresh and to remind us there is always rebirth waiting on the horizon.
There are several ways to have a new moon ritual – actually, I like to call it a New Moon Celebration. But if you are following the cycles of the moon and are working consistently on letting go of heavy and dark energy at the full moon and inviting or manifesting lighter energy during the new moon – these are rituals. I find great comfort in the practice of the rituals.
Establishing a ritual or a routine to work on being the best version of myself feels really good to me. It keeps me focused on the positive things in my life. Here are some practices that can be used during the New Moon either separately or all together to create a powerful ritual!
CLEANSE & SMUDGE
This removes any built up negativity that has accumulated and cleanses the environment and the self for what we are going to have flowing into our lives in the next cycle. I don’t know about you, but I personally feel an energetic difference in the room when I smudge.
I use sage – but you can opt for many different items to cleanse your space if sage does not appeal to you. Sweet grass, cedar and/or essential oils used in a spritzing bottle are often used, too. I like to say a blessing to Mother Earth, or Gaia, and thank her for her support of our life on this planet. You could say a prayer – any prayer – that appeals to you.
I usually light the sage and then blow it out so it has an ember like incense, I use a shall or fire-safe bowl to hold under it and waft the smoke of the sage with a feather to all corners of my room in a circular fashion. Or, if I’m outdoors, I waft the smoke in a circular fashion surrounding me in the area I am holding the ceremony. Don’t forget to waft the sage towards the floor and the sky as well. Of course, be mindful of the embers and don’t start a fire!
You don’t have to have an altar to perform a New Moon Ceremony, but I think they are wonderful to have. You need somewhere to set down the tools you are using – and why not use some things to significant to the meaning of your ceremony?
I usually find something to represent each element for my altar. Such as: a candle for fire, a seashell for water, a feather for air and herbs or flowers for earth. I often use crystals, too – their sparkly presence always has a magical feel and they’re just pretty. Keep in mind, that crystals usually have metaphysical properties and enhance and support certain emotions or feelings. If you want to get very specific – you can choose crystals for these properties – or you can simply choose them because you think they are beautiful.
Your altar needs to be personal to you. And, after all, this ceremony to me is a version of your personal soul church, so if it has meaning to you – use it. You can have a statue of a goddess, or a picture of Jesus, or a Buddha statue, anything you like. Pictures of your family – anything you hold sacred is fair game, in my opinion.
Often, I include a vessel of water, or a small cauldron of fire. I do this because I like to send my intentions of the ceremony up to the universe. Water and fire at the perfect ways to give these to the universe. If you place your intentions in the water, they will dissolve into the earth and you will have her helping hand for them to come to fruition. If you place the intentions in the fire – they will burn and the smoke will deliver them to the earth through the air.
You will also need something to carry the energy of your intention. I have used so many things. You can simply write these intentions down on a piece of paper to slip into the water or fire. I have used rose petals, fallen leaves, acorns, etc. Really, your imagination is the limit to what you can use – and it’s a fun project to put this ceremony together finding things in nature that represent what you are wishing to accomplish. (Remember – if you do a search in nature for items – take only items that are not being used anymore – do not take a birds nest or something that is in use by one of your outdoor friends!)
In this ceremony that I am going to recommend, I am going to use seeds. We are sending out thoughts on this new moon that we want to grow into fruition and become our reality. What better represents that, than a seed? You can use a flower seed, herb seeds. What about a mustard seed or the acorn? All appropriate. As I said – your imagination is your limit! Use what feels right to you – there is no right or wrong in doing this.
Alternatively to releasing these intentions – you could have an intention journal. If you do this – you’ll need your journal for the celebration.
YOUR MANIFESTATION RITUAL
Here is where the personalization of the ceremony goes a step further. You can do this in a group, or you can have an individual ceremony. You have your altar set up, you have smudged and cleared your space, you have said a prayer to bless the space and declare the space as a sacred area for which you are going to hold a ceremony of intention.
I like to start off with a meditation. Sometimes I will write my own meditation or sometimes I will listen to a pre-recorded meditation. I like to take time to do this so that I can quiet my mind and focus on what it is I really want to set into intention during this celebration. After I have performed a meditation, I get to work on the actual intention portion.
I will use the item I wish to infuse with my intention: the piece of paper that I write on, a seed, a petal to communicate this intention out loud. If you are doing this ceremony individually – saying these intentions as you write them is helpful. It can be distracting if you’re in a group and you’re all saying them out loud – so do what best suits the forum of your group. I will write these intentions on the paper; or I will hold a rose petal, or a leaf, or a seed to my forehead and I will focus on pushing the feeling of that intention into that item. I want that intention to be infused into the item I’m using. After infusing the item with intention, I then blow the breath of that intention into the item. I will then carry that item to the bowl of water or put it into the fire to give it to the universe.
(This is where the journal comes in if you are choosing to keep an intention journal. You’re going to write down these intentions in the journal. You will not want to put the journal in the fire or water – you will keep it so that you can continue to write about your work through the year as you cycle through your releasing and manifesting celebrations.)
You infuse several items or write down more than one intention. Often, we are working on more than one thing in our life. However, don’t do so many that your intentions get diluted and you lose your focus. We have 13 cycles in the year to continue our work for the year.
As such, you could start your intention cycle in January, using a broad scope of what it is you want to accomplish and then on the new moon each following month, work in detail on specific portions of your grand intention. You could wait and see how your intentions are coming together and create supporting or different intentions the following months depending on how you feel it’s going. If you’re not working on a big intention that requires focus of more than a month, you can set completely new, unrelated intentions each month. Again, this is all a personal journey and so there is no right or wrong way to do this! Trust your instincts and do what feels good to you.
You just need to be aware, that when you are setting these intentions, they need to be for YOU. You cannot control what others do. You’ll want to focus on YOUR happiness, your goals, what you would like to see happen in your life.
After my intentions have been delivered to the fire or water, or recorded in my journal, I usually like to have a closing prayer or poem that represents the sentiment of my celebration. Something inspirational and meaningful to me. Sometimes I might play some music or a song that supports those feelings as well.
If you placed items infused with your intentions into water – make sure that you take the bowl of water outdoors within the next 12 hours and pour it onto the earth. If you put your intentions in the fire – be mindful of the fire and try to let it burn out naturally – you don’t want to “squash” the energy of your intentions by putting out the flame before it burns out.
ALTERNATIVE OR ADDITIONAL CELEBRATION – A SACRED NEW MOON BATH RITUAL
In addition to the ceremony above, or as an alternative to it, you can choose to celebration with a sacred new moon bath.
Designate a special journal to be your New Moon Journal. Write your intentions in this journal. Next, run a bath – and make it a sacred ritual that you do at the time of the new moon – add salts, essential oils, herbs or flower petals. Pamper yourself. Submerge yourself into this bath with the mindset that you are immersing yourself within the energy of rebirth.
You can also create a sacred altar space with candles, crystals or statues if you like the altar element of the celebration above. Some people even take a vessel of water outdoors and let it soak up new moon energy on the night of the new moon – then they pour that into the bathtub the following morning and bathe in the new moon water and hold their celebration at the beginning of the day to symbolize the new beginnings they are intending to cultivate.
These are merely suggestions on how to hold a New Moon Celebration. There are a lot of suggestions on-line and even in Pinterest. Take a gander at what’s out there. Or you can use my guidelines as your template. However you choose to celebrate the cycles of the earth and use them for your releasing and manifesting powers should resonate with meaning to you.
Good luck creating the life you desire using the natural cycles of the moon as your energetic friend!
Misty Pennington is a compassion mentor, Eden Energy Medicine certified reiki practitioner, intuitive, crystal singing bowl alchemist, and all-around witchy woman. She is the owner of The Garden of Common Ground in St. Louis, Missouri. For more information, visit Gardenofcommonground.com.
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Happy Sunday! Just wanted to say a quick thanks to everybody who joined us on Facebook for the Full Moon Releasing Ceremony. Apologies for the poor audio quality – we’re learning. Misty and I will be making more videos in the future and eventually we’ll get the kinks worked out. Now that we’ve done the releasing for this full moon, I think we’re going to do a manifestation ceremony for the new moon coming up. I’ll keep you updated with details.
Another announcement: I contributed an article on crystals to boost your personal bliss to this month’s issue of Ista Magazine by The Decorista. Hop over and check it out.
Question from a reader:
“Hey Ashley! I’ve been reading about manifestation a lot and how our fundamental/subconscious beliefs draw experiences to us. After realizing what we subconsciously believe, what’s the best way to change it? For example, I’m realizing I’ve always believed that God won’t give me the things I want–I’ve entwined “struggle” with God’s will. Is it best to work “top down” with mantras? Or is there another way?”
I first, for the readers who are unfamiliar, want to address manifestation/Law of Attraction for a minute. People often get confused when it comes to law of attraction because they think of it in very literal terms – “If someone is being mean to me, it means I am mean,” or something of that nature, but that’s a little bit too literal.
Others will tell you that you attract what you already feel, energetically. “I’m feeling upset and sad so I’m attracting more things and people that will make me feel upset and sad.” That’s getting closer, but still a little bit too literal, and way too surface level.
Let’s take away the concept of “positive” and “negative” energy for a moment and just look at it as energy that is on the same frequency, whatever frequency that may be.
While it is emotional energy that is attracting like energy, it’s a much deeper, more subconscious form of energy that resides in beliefs and attitudes that we hold – the most fundamental beliefs and attitudes that are the foundation of all of our other, more surface level beliefs and attitudes.
A lot of the time, we don’t even realize that we hold those beliefs and attitudes even though we play them out in a myriad of ways day in and day out. For example, let’s say that deep down, you don’t feel worthy of love. That’s the most basic (negative) belief you hold about yourself and it’s the foundation of all kinds of other negative beliefs. Pretend that is the cornerstone – the first brick laid in the foundation of your ego.
The next brick that stems from not feeling worthy of love is, “I’m a bad person,” (i.e. I’m not worthy of love because I’m a bad person).
The next brick is, “I did something wrong,” (i.e. I did something wrong because I’m a bad person and that’s why I’m not worthy of love).
The next brick is, “This is my fault,” (This is my fault, I did something wrong because I’m a bad person and that’s why I’m not worthy of love).
You see, you being to create a narrative – a personal story – out of these beliefs. But nobody really wants to think that they’re a bad person so they repress those thoughts and push them out of their mind, but they still reside in their subconscious as beliefs. Only now, the person has begun to ignore it. We call this the shadow self.
When these thoughts and beliefs become repressed and we’re not aware of them, we begin to project. In this instance, it would come out as someone who feels like a victim all the time. The subconscious narrative of, “this is my fault,” turns into, “Everybody blames me for everything.” This is so that the ego doesn’t have to bare the responsibility any longer (even though it’s the one holding the beliefs in the first place).
Now this person has this narrative of, “Everybody blames me for everything,” that they repeat over and over in a variety of situations, consistently reinforcing their own negative view of self, and at the root of it is the belief that they are somehow inherently flawed and they may even subconsciously feel responsible even when it’s not their fault! So they keep attracting to themselves situations (and people) that match that victim energy. Every victim needs a perpetrator.
As we dig through those layers and dismantle our belief system, brick by brick, we slowly reach the cornerstone and it’s through that process that we are able to change our most fundamental beliefs and attitudes.
Sometimes, simply uncovering and acknowledging those beliefs is enough to release them. Other times, they are deeply ingrained and we have to reprogram ourselves, in a way, in order to let go. That’s when mantras can be helpful.
I wrote a previous blog post called How To Get Rid of Stubborn Beliefs that lists some practical tips for changing your thoughts by using logic. I wouldn’t really say that there’s a ‘best’ way to go about it, just your way. Play around with things and figure out what works for you. I’d recommend a holistic approach to it – use mantras, do a releasing ceremony, figure out which chakra that particular belief is associated with and get yourself a crystal to help balance that energy, work toward changing your internal narrative. Keep those things up consistently and eventually you will notice a change.
2017 is the Year to Begin or Expand Your Heart-Based Business
First off, happy new year! I know so many of us were glad to see this year go. It was a tough one for a lot of people, but I think a lot of us ended on a strong note. I started offering readings back in July. I’ve done several by now and what I’ve found interesting, especially as the end of the year has approached, is the number of people who have expressed a desire to begin their own heart-based business and become a spiritual entrepreneur.
One of the reasons I’ve found it interesting is because, naturally, it seems to align with what I’m working toward right now as well (and a lot of my readings have in some way, shape or form). The other reason I find it intriguing came up when I started doing my New Year Life Themes Reports.
As part of that report, I analyze the energy for the coming year using numerology. I was quite surprised – although I shouldn’t have been – by what I found. Next year, 2017, is a GREAT year to start a spiritual practice, healing business, or any kind of entrepreneurial role that involves helping others.
I feel that’s why so many of the readings I have been doing lately are centered around that theme – a lot of us have been feeling the call and are beginning to respond to it. Some of us have been laying the groundwork throughout 2016 and I’m here to tell you that 2017 is the year to bring it all together. If you’ve just been doing it on the side as a hobby and have been feeling the pull to make it your full time job – make it a priority for 2017. You couldn’t ask for a better time.
I have truly been fascinated by how many people have asked me this question, especially recently. As I was crunching the numbers, I suddenly felt incredibly validated about my own choice to pursue this. It’s what makes me happy. I should have recognized that this was where I was meant to go two years ago, but I travelled off the path briefly. Let me explain…
Since I graduated college, I held a string of incredibly miserable jobs. Jobs working for people who were emotionally immature, had drug problems, were emotionally abusive and vindictive, or complete and total narcissists. I could truly horrify you with the stories I have from several of my jobs, but I’ll spare you the details.
Toward the end of 2013, I was in a job that I loved, but working for people and a company I hated. I sat at my desk for eight months and repeatedly said to myself, “Why am I even here? I hate this job.” And the universe gave me what I was subconsciously asking for – it got me out of that job. Not the way I necessarily would have expected… but it happened.
So I could have sulked for a good long while, panicked and immediately started searching for yet another job in desperation that I might have ended up hating just as much. But I didn’t. I chose to take control and started my own business as a digital marketing consultant.
I was headed out of that job one way or another, because I had better things on the horizon. Whether or not I would follow those signs, or ignore them and stay in that cycle of jobs I hated (believe me, that was just the last in a LOOONG line) was entirely up to me.
The control is all in your thoughts and beliefs about those situations. Law of Attraction – like attracts like.
In starting my own business, I did work for regular companies and I also had a focus on spiritual entrepreneurs called ThirtyThreeSix. I was very successful at what I did. I LOVED working for myself, I loved that I had plenty of time to do whatever I wanted. And in that time, I also started this little side project called In My Sacred Space as a hobby.
After two years of working for myself, I still loved the freedom, but the work wasn’t all that satisfying anymore. I felt restless and disinterested. It was at that time, the end of 2015, that I was offered the opportunity to join one of my clients full time as Marketing Director. I loved the people I worked with so much, that I decided to do it. All the while, I kept In My Sacred Space going as a side project. It had become my real passion… but when 2016 rolled in, life and work got in the way. Somehow, I managed to keep it afloat despite all of the obstacles.
As the year rolled on, I started feeling the urge to make spirituality my full time business, whatever that entailed. As things at my current job unraveled, I wondered if I’d made a mistake by going to work for someone else again. And at the beginning of December, I opted to back to consulting with the intention of putting as much time and energy as possible into IMSS and making it my full time business.
I realized, just today, that the reason things never seemed to pan out anywhere else is because it wasn’t really where I was meant to be, although certainly, all of the experience I gained from those jobs will serve me extremely well in this new endeavor. Since making the conscious decision to do this, I feel good. I feel like I’m where I’m supposed to be, and I’m excited about it.
The thing about it was, there were little road signs all along to point me in the right direction. I’m perceptive enough (nowadays, at least) to take note of those signs and let my intuition guide me. I got off track, momentarily, but now I’m back and I feel better than ever.
There are better things on your horizon, too – the question is, will you take that leap of faith that is required to create them?
PS – if you are ready to start your business or expand it and you’re looking for help with web design, branding, or email marketing, check out my business page and drop me a line.
I‘m currently vacationing in Cabo San Lucas. I know, I know, you’re like, “Weren’t you just in Portugal?” I was, but that was for work. And technically this is a work rewards trip for my husband that his company sends us on every two years. Yes, we’re very lucky…or are we?
Both of us have been writing down our life dreams and goals for a very long time. I know that I started creating vision boards long before I even really understood what manifestation and Law of Attraction was. Back when I was single, I wrote down a list of qualities I was looking for in a significant other. As “luck” would have it, he’s got almost all of them. I also wrote down a list of things that I wanted to be able to do “some day.” I’ve also achieved almost all of those. Four years ago, my husband wrote down all of the things he wanted to achieve by 2017, and as “luck” would have it, we’ve done most of it.
Since I’ve had a lot of time to sit around the pool, I’ve been using it to really reflect on what I want next, which was kind of funny because later, I looked up my personal year for numerology (it’s a 3 year) and apparently it’s all about deciding what you want. Where should I have life take me? And since a new year is right around the corner, it’s always the perfect time to start setting intentions for the next episode. I set a few goals for myself at the end of 2015 which I didn’t totally tackle, as life had a few surprises in store. But some of them I did:
“One of them, certainly, is this blog. I hope it continues to grow at an even more rapid pace than it already has. It’s only been a year and a half and I just can’t believe that nearly 400 people have subscribed to it!”
Holy wow did I blow that one away… this time last year I had “almost” 400 subscribers. Right now, I’m set to have 900 by the end of December. There were a couple of goals that I didn’t accomplish, though.
“One of my goals for the coming year is to get back into doing some of the online spirituality classes that I started earlier in 2015. You can view my first one, Transpersonal Psychology: Transcending the Ego for an idea of what to expect. If you have any ideas for classes that you’d like me to cover, please comment!”
Getting back into classes is something that’s still on the radar for next year, along with finishing the oracle deck that I’m working on with a friend of mine, perhaps starting a podcast if I can find the time, and certainly working on and hopefully finishing the book I’ve decided to write. It’s going to be a busy year! Oh, I suppose I’ll attempt to branch into some videos as well, as much as I hate being on video.
I want to gather personal stories from regular people – stories that are some of your most painful experiences… and I want to hear about how those experiences taught you about Love (with a capital L).
If you would like to participate, you can email me your story (firstname.lastname@example.org). Let me know if you want to be named or if you want to be anonymous. Don’t worry about the writing, I won’t be using your stories verbatim, but rather looking at bits and pieces and finding common themes and using them to weave together various universal lessons. I may email you back with some follow up questions.
Doesn’t matter how big or how small the story – what matters is how you feel about it. You can also send in more than one story if you like.
I’ll take submissions through the end of January. If I end up using your story, I’ll notify you 🙂
I’ve got a lot of other personal goals to work toward, too, like better health, both physically and energetically. More routine. Yoga. That sort of thing.
I’m headed back to reality today – and a lot of cold weather. Brrr. But I’m actually looking forward to it because I feel ready to get started on all of these things and turn all of these thoughts into reality.
People often get confused when it comes to law of attraction because they take it too literally. They think that if someone is being mean to them, it must mean that they are mean, because like attracts like. But that’s not how it works.
Others will tell you that you attract what you already feel, energetically. “I’m feeling upset and sad so I’m attracting more things that will make me feel upset and sad.” That’s getting closer, but still a little bit too literal – and way too surface level.
Let’s take away the concept of “positive” and “negative” energy for a moment and just look at it as energy that is on the same frequency, whatever frequency that may be.
While it IS emotional energy that is attracting like energy, it’s a much deeper, more subconscious form of energy that resides in beliefs and attitudes that we hold… the most fundamental beliefs and attitudes that are the foundation of all of our other, more surface level beliefs and attitudes.
A lot of the time, we don’t even realize that we hold those beliefs and attitudes even though we play them out in a myriad of ways day in and day out.
For example – let’s say that deep down, you don’t feel worthy of love. That’s the most basic (negative) belief you hold about yourself and it’s the foundation of all kinds of other negative beliefs. Pretend that is the cornerstone, the first brick laid in the foundation of your ego.
The next brick that stems from not feeling worthy of love is, “I’m a bad person.” (i.e. I’m not worthy of love because I’m a bad person).
The next brick is, “I did something wrong.” (i.e. I did something wrong because I’m a bad person and that’s why I’m not worthy of love).
The next brick is, “This is my fault.” (This is my fault, I did something wrong because I’m a bad person and that’s why I’m not worthy of love).
You see, you begin to create a narrative – a personal story – out of these beliefs. But nobody really wants to think that they’re a bad person so they repress those thoughts. They push them out of their mind,but they still reside in their subconscious as beliefs. But now the person has begun to ignore it. We call this the shadow self.
When these thoughts and beliefs become repressed and we’re not aware of them, we begin to project. In this instance, it would come out as someone who feels like a victim all the time. The subconscious narrative of “this is my fault” turns into “Everybody blames me for everything.” This is so that the ego doesn’t have to bare the responsibility any longer (even though it’s the one holding the beliefs in the first place).
Now this person has this narrative of “everybody blames me for everything” that they repeat over and over, and at the root of it is the belief that they are somehow inherently flawed and they may even subconsciously feel responsible even when it’s not their fault!
So they keep attracting to themselves situations (and people) that match that victim energy. Every victim needs a perpetrator.
What’s interesting is that the perpetrator will often suffer from exactly the same subconscious beliefs, but they, too, project and instead of being the weaker of the two, their imbalance creates a dominating effect which they act out by not taking responsibility for their actions, and blaming the other person.
When we become self-aware, we can begin to recognize these narratives. When we start questioning the narrative and asking ourselves, “What’s behind this?” we start to get down to the foundation, brick by brick, until we reach the root of the belief. That’s where the foundation for Law of Attraction lives, as well as your most fundamental underlying fear.
When you change that fundamental belief into a positive one, that’s when you will begin to manifest new experiences that match that frequency.