Acknowledging Your Fear

Acknowledging Your Fear

The things we refuse to acknowledge haunt us like ghosts. Hidden specters of fear and grief follow each of us around, screaming into our subconscious and manifesting themselves in the world around us demanding to be recognized.

Our worst fears about ourselves live in our subconscious mind, occasionally floating close enough to the surface for us to become mildly aware of, but most of the time, we quickly shove them back into the depths and pretend it never happened. However, in order to fully integrate our shadow selves, we must do the opposite.

There’s something incredibly healing about acknowledging your worst fears. It brings them into the light and allows them to be transmuted. 

When we continue suppressing them, they continue to haunt us. And the more we ignore them, the more powerful they become.

They manifest themselves as beliefs, attitudes, and addictions; and more physically as diseases and abusive relationships, all of which reflect back to us this thing inside of ourselves that we refuse to see.

Even then, we may find incredibly creative ways to continue resisting our shadow selves, the most extravagant being when we choose to separate them from ourselves altogether. When we reach the point that we’re no longer just ignoring our shadow self, but completely disembodying it from ourselves, that’s when it begins to appear outside of us… in the form of negative entities and “demonic attachments.”

We convince ourselves that we are so good, so pure and so holy that we cannot possibly be this thing that we fear (even though we’ve been told a thousand times that we are all “one” and there is no separation) and ironically, create the ultimate separation – a separation of self…a separation from self.


If you find yourself haunted, or hear wild tales of supernatural malevolent forces acting upon another person, the first thing you need to ask is, “What fear has been buried so deeply and not being acknowledged for so long that it is now manifesting itself in such an ugly way?”

Only through acknowledgement of our fears and taking responsibility for the things we experience can we truly experience ourselves as whole beings. Nothing can be released until it is acknowledged. The more you resist, the more it will persist.

How Past Lives Affect Our Current Life

How Past Lives Affect Our Current Life

Question from a reader:

“Can your past lives create havoc on the life you are currently living? Does regression therapy help? If you feel completely and entirely unbalanced and you have this guy feeling it has something to do with a past life or something along those lines, do you have any solid advice? Thank you!”

Your past lives (and future lives, for that matter) are intimately connected with your current life.

In order to gain a better understanding of this, we first have to realize that while our lives appear to be occurring in a linear sequence from our perspective here on earth, they, in fact, exist outside of the confines of “time.”

I’ve explained this in several of my previous posts:

This completely changes the way we look at the effects of “past” lives.

If you’re assuming that reincarnation is linear, then it presumes that past lives influence this one, but future lives do not because from your perspective within time, they haven’t “happened” yet. Assuming that reincarnation is a linear process also creates a belief that your actions in this current life do not affect your previous life.

When you view your incarnations as something that exist simultaneously, it becomes easier to understand how all of your lives are tied together and hold an energetic influence over one another.


Additionally, the notion that we are here to resolve something that occurred in a past life becomes irrelevant, since the past exists right alongside the present. This allows us to come to a fuller understanding that while we experience these things in a linear, cause/effect manner, the purpose of them is not the end result (a resolution) but rather the experience of the process itself. In other words – life is about the journey, not the destination.

Now that we’ve established a better context of how our other incarnations really work in relation to this life, let’s look at the main points of your question.

Can past lives create havoc on the one you’re in? Firstly, the notion of ‘creating havoc’ is a bit of a human judgement. While your “past” (and future) lives are intrinsically connected to your current life, energetically, they do not create this life. You do. If you were to look at all of your lives, you might see similar themes and patterns emerge. Your soul set these lives up in this way in order for you to have a specific experience.

I’ll give you an example of my own:

When I was in college, I had a difficult romantic relationship with someone who I now know is a member of my soul group and is someone that I’ve had many past (and future) lives with. I’m aware of several (8-10) of those lives and what occurred in them. When I look at the overarching themes that reoccur over the totality of those lives, it becomes easy to see a clear pattern.

In each of those lives, he leaves me and it’s always for some sense of duty or greater purpose – to become a priest, to join the military, to get involved in politics, etc. The leaving and the relationship itself always triggers a great deal of self-worth issues for me. I’m fairly certain I killed myself in one of those lives or at least considered it, because I was so devastated.

The purpose of all of those lives was for me to experience love – both for myself and for another. I didn’t know or understand what love was, nor did I realize that I didn’t love myself very much until the person I was seeking validation from rejected me, and that set me on a course of deep self-reflection and soul searching.

Another way that past lives can affect us, energetically, is when past life traumas create energetic blockages that carry over into this life. I’ll give you another real life example:

I had a friend who suffered quite a bit from anxiety and depression, low self-esteem, etc. He had great difficulty believing in himself and gave up on his hopes and aspirations very easily, because he didn’t think he was able to carry them forward. Some of what was contributing to that were events in this life and the effects they had on him, but there were also past life traumas that were contributing to it.

We call it an energetic blockage, and that’s what it is, but you also have to realize that our thoughts and beliefs ARE that energy. So some people might tell you, “Oh, this energy blockage is causing you to have these negative thoughts,” but really it’s the negative thoughts that ARE the energy blockage.

So I had my friend do a distance healing session with my friend Tara. There was a dramatic difference in him the next day – it was like this blockage of negative thoughts had been stifling his creativity, and suddenly it was gone and all of these ideas came pouring out. He was in a better place than I had seen him in a long time.

The thing about these kinds of things, though, is that while the trauma from that past life may have been healed, he still had to work on the parts of THIS LIFE that were contributing to it. And if he didn’t do that, he’d end up with re-creating that same negative energy block all over again.

So while a past life regression, life between lives regression, energy healing, or an akashic record reading can absolutely help shed some light on what’s going on, and even help with alleviating some of those immediate issues, they won’t fix the issues in your current life. It’s up to you to do that – but they can make it a little easier for you to go about it.

As I said before, the things that you are experiencing are just as much rooted in this life as they are your concurrent lives – it’s up to you to recognize the pattern, what it is that you are attempting to experience, and then embrace that experience to it’s fullest, learning as much as you can from it and then release it. Sometimes this is a long process. The example I mentioned above occurred over a 13 year period for me, but it was an important life lesson and one that i wouldn’t change, and I am extremely grateful for it.

For more information on figuring out which of these types of regressions or readings is right for you, you can visit my blog post on how to choose a psychic. You can also visit my Recommended Psychics and Healer’s page for people that I’ve used.

8 Ways To Surround Your Home With Crystal Energy

8 Ways To Surround Your Home With Crystal Energy

I LOVE that home decor trends are heading down a very organic route. One of the biggest trends as part of this is using natural stones and crystals in your home decor. As many of us have known for a long time, crystals are awesome for a lot of different things, the least of which is the fact that they’re pretty. So it’s great that you can now find crystals and natural stones in all sorts of home decor and create ways to incorporate crystals into your home without displaying them as your rock collection ;).

Check out the list below for eight ways to surround your home with crystal energy!

Ways to surround your home with crystal energy #1: Quartz Crystal Hanging Light Fixture.


Ways to surround your home with crystal energy #2: Crystal and Natural Stone Drawer Pulls


Ways to surround your home with crystal energy 3: Geode Book Ends.


Ways to surround your home with crystal energy #4: Amethyst Concrete Countertop.


Ways to surround your home with crystal energy #5: Calcite Table Lamp.


Ways to surround your home with crystal energy #6:Agate Geode Slices.


Ways to surround your home with crystal energy #27 & 8: Agate Slice Coasters and Quartz Crystal Point Lamp Base.


If you’re really into number seven but you’re not really interested in the $130 price tag, you can recreate them yourself for about $40 – at least I did.

I bought four agate slices on eBay for about $30, used some liquid gold leaf around the edges (purchased at Michael’s for $8) and then add some little clear rubber bumpers to the bottom. Voila:


DIY Energy Cleanse

DIY Energy Cleanse

With the holidays coming up and lots of family visiting, you might be walking into a mine field of emotional triggers and karmic relationships. Stress can skyrocket. You’ll want to find ways to relax, release, and transmute some of that pent up negative energy.

The Energetic Cleansing Properties of Salt (Are Nonexistent??)
One of my favorite ways to de-stress and cleanse after a rough day is a long, hot salt bath.

The folklore around salt is that it cleanses negative energy and you’ll find superstitions around it claiming that it wards off negative energy, protects from negative entities, etc. I’ve done a few google searches and found plenty of sites prescribing salt for energetic cleansing, but not a single one of them has explained how or why salt allegedly does what it does although it seems to appear in belief systems originating in Africa such as HooDoo and VooDoo. Even more hilarious, in some Christian traditional lore, spilling salt was considered negative in and of itself, and was not only considered bad luck, but an invitation to let the devil in! I guess I never realized my favorite relaxation technique was actually a Devil’s Bath… lol.


I believe that everything has an energetic property to it, but whether or not that energy has any specific function is entirely up to your beliefs and intent about it, so I’m going to run with the notion that salt is good for energy cleansing because people believe it is. Since it’s a natural substance, it may hold a vibration closer to your normal, balanced vibration and therefore help you rebalance yourself when you’re unable to maintain your own energy.

Health Benefits of Certain Salts
While salt may not actually cleanse your energy, it does have some health benefits. Sea salt allegedly detoxifies your skin when used as a paste, as well as exfoliates it. Epsom salt, which isn’t actually salt, but rather a mineral compound (magnesium sulfate), is high in magnesium, which, when absorbed through the skin, plays a number of roles in the body including regulating the activity of over 325 enzymes, reducing inflammation, helping muscle and nerve function and helping to prevent artery hardening. Sulfates help improve the absorption of nutrients, flush toxins and help ease migraine headaches.

So, you can get a lot of physical benefits from a salt bath, and if you use it with the intent of cleansing your own energy, you still get the added benefit of an energy cleanse.

Energy Cleanse in a Jar
I recently switched over to Young Living’s skin care line (which I love), and when I did, I got a YL starter kit that came with several samples of essential oils. I hadn’t done anything with them in months, and at the end of gardening season, I also had some lavender left over and I’d decided I was going to make some essential oil infused bath salts.

That was approximately one week prior to my kitchen renovation beginning, so here we are, eleven weeks later. The kitchen is finally finished (photos coming soon!), and since it was so close to Christmas time, I decided to make bath salts as Christmas gifts. They were super easy! And with the essential oils added, you get the extra benefit of aromatherapy and whatever vibrational qualities the oils add to it. Feel free to substitute your favorite scents.


1 cup Epsom Salt

1 cup Sea Salt (you can also use Himalayan salt)

2 tbl sp Dried lavender buds

1 tbl sp Dried, chopped rosemary

5 drops lavender essential oil

5 drops Peace & Calming essential oil

5 drops peppermint essential oil

Mix it all together in a bowl, seal in an air-tight jar and you’re done.

I like the smell of the lavender and I LOVE the tingle of the peppermint. It’s  little bit like icy hot, so it’s really good for sore muscles. Of course, the warm water is also helpful for relaxing and de-stressing.


To use: 
Mix a couple of handfuls into a hot bath, and enjoy! I usually like to incorporate a little bit of a meditation and visualization along with it for the purposes of energy cleansing and releasing.



How To Be More Discerning With Spirit Communication

How To Be More Discerning With Spirit Communication

Question from a reader:

“I am wondering what thought you might have about strengthening discernment abilities and uncovering belief systems. Discernment in terms of knowing what entities interacting with us bring truth or have truthful agendas. Frequencies can still be aligned for attraction but because belief systems can be tricky to uncover or understand one can be found gullible or too trusting?? Must admit that I am trying to get my brain to sort out all these new spiritual concepts as well as set aside judgements about ‘negatives’ things. Yet I intuitively sense that our abilities to discern truth when dealing with the ‘unknown’ via a tool such as a ouija board requires a sharper tool or maybe just a stronger understanding of who we are — which people like myself may be developing in parallel with psychic connections.”

Let me say, for a moment, that I believe that all “entities” out there are really just aspects of ourself, and those entities are drawn to us or in some cases straight up manifested by us into our personal experience through law of attraction.


As far as discernment goes, if have the experience of interacting with something that gives the appearance of being a dishonest entity, it’s embodying a frequency of dishonesty, which is not in alignment with a frequency of unconditional love. That kind of experience is not going to be attracted (or rather, manifested, since you are the creator of your experiences) by a person with intent for the highest good who is living in a truthful manner and being honest with themselves.

The more one fears an entity is being dishonest with them, the more likely they are to attract an experience of coming in contact with one who will be.

So the best way to discern whether or not the information you are receiving is truthful is to TRUST that it is. But trust in it’s purest, strongest, healthiest sense. The kind of trust you have in a person that you love and have known all your life. It’s solid, there’s no room for doubt.

But it’s more than that. What you have to look at, internally, as far as belief systems go, is your personal motivations for trust – are you trusting because this entity is telling you what you WANT to hear? Or because you don’t trust yourself and are instead putting your trust in something outside of yourself? If it’s using your own personal fear as a way to control you, it’s not coming from a good place.

What do I mean by this? Let’s say, for example, that your deepest fear is that you don’t belong and that people look down on you. You see all of these people on spiritual groups developing their abilities and you want to do something to prove to those people that you’re special, that you’re one of them, because you need validation from others (because you don’t love yourself enough to not care what other people think). So you set out to become a channeler or develop your psychic abilities, and suddenly you start receiving information from a “spirit” who tells you all sorts of things about yourself that make you feel really special – even though those things directly contradict other information that you’ve read, heard, or understood. And rather than using your own powers of discernment to question that information, you allow yourself to believe those things. You put your faith and your trust in this outside entity rather than putting that trust in yourself.

Your own personal fear is being used to manipulate you.

Then what happens? That spirit starts encouraging you to put yourself in situations that your own insecurities will be triggered. Maybe it tells you that you should profess to people all of these things about yourself, or it starts feeding you false predictions and encouraging you to spread those predictions which causes you to put yourself, purposely, into situations where people will will disagree with you and trigger your fear-based emotional reaction, gaining from you the negative emotions that attracted/manifested it in the first place and thus sustains the experience.

You, of course, are allowing this to happen through your refusal to work on your own personal issues. You certainly attracted the experience which is tantamount to manifesting it. This also, of course, gives you the opportunity to bring your own issues into the light. When this sort of thing happens over and over again, it’s a giant waving red flag for you to WORK ON YOUR SHIT. But some people get stuck in that mindset and things have to get to the point where they are nearly losing their grip on reality and have an emotional breakdown before they acknowledge it. All experiences provide us with learning opportunities.

This is why I have written in the past that there’s one thing you must do before developing your psychic abilities – work on your shit! Or else your shit will work on you. You can learn things the easy way, or you can learn them the hard way. Either way… you’re going to learn. Every experience we manifest into our lives gives us opportunities to become aware of what’s inside of us.

With regard to channeled messages:

If any information that you receive puts you in a state of fear or dependence, chuck it in the fuck it bucket. Good info will never make you dependent and it will always guide you to go within and rely on yourself. It will also never be fear-based. If the information that you are receiving seems dualistic in any way, then it’s not coming from a higher realm of consciousness. If YOU hold fear-based beliefs, you are more likely to interpret information you are receiving in a fear-based way.

My internal compass is always this: Ask yourself where this information is coming from? Is it coming from love or is it coming from fear? Is it pushing toward love or is it pushing you toward fear? Sometimes fear comes wrapped up in a pretty package that sounds like things you want to hear.

Power, Control, and Understanding Boundaries

Power, Control, and Understanding Boundaries

You hear a lot of talk about boundaries. “Set boundaries.” “Uphold boundaries.” “Don’t overstep boundaries.” But what exactly does that mean and what does it look like?

A personal boundary is the line between your energy and someone else’s energy. We set boundaries every day in many situations. We have personal space boundaries. We have personal emotional boundaries. We have personal energetic boundaries. We have philosophical boundaries and moral boundaries. All of these things can be tied together, or looked at individually.

When you have healthy boundaries, you’ve got plenty of space within your little circle, and so does the other person. This here is personal power and neither party is abusing it. Neither party is giving up their personal power, either. This is good, healthy and creates a balanced and harmonious environment.

When one of the parties has unhealthy boundaries, things get lopsided. This here becomes “control.” There is a personal power struggle. One party is asserting their personal power over the other party. Things are no longer harmonious and balanced. One person’s space is intruding on the other person’s space.

This type of thing tends to happen between two people when one of them oversteps their boundaries. But here’s the key – they wouldn’t be able to do that if the other person didn’t allow it.

See how weak the other person’s boundary is? In those instances, not only is the other person taking power away from the person with weaker boundaries, the weaker person is allowing that exchange by not upholding their boundary.

One of the most common reasons people are unable to uphold personal boundaries is because they don’t want to cause conflict or rock the boat. They mistakenly believe that standing up for themselves is somehow selfish, and they are afraid that they will be perceived as attacking the other person. They don’t want to do that, and so they allow others to run over them – sometimes even accidentally or unintentionally.

It is not selfish to love yourself just as much as you love other people.

You also have the opposite effect in a lot of instances. The person who is overstepping their boundary actually believes they are just upholding their personal space.

How to Uphold Personal Boundaries Without Overstepping

There’s an easy way to tell what’s really happening, though, and it involves looking carefully at the words you are using or the words that are being communicated to you.

If you are upholding a personal boundary, you are making statements about yourself. “I feel…” “I am…”

If you are overstepping your personal boundary, you are making statements directed at the other person. “You are…” “You shouldn’t…”

When you make statements in an attempt to shame someone or judge them, what’s really happening is you’re asserting your own moral superiority and making yourself “better than,” whether or not you actually realize it. You’re trying to overtake their boundaries.

Your disapproval of their actions is completely fine – for yourself. But the minute you take what you believe to be ok for yourself and attempt to force that onto other people, you start to slowly encroach on their circle.

Someone who doesn’t have a clear understanding of boundaries will generally feel threatened when you stick up for yourself, and that’s ok. If you’re worried about a misunderstanding, just make sure that you are making statements about your personal feelings and what you allow in your space. “I do not believe that.” “This doesn’t make sense to me because…” Feel free to explain why you don’t believe that. It’s a natural discourse and it’s an attempt to create understanding.

If you’re afraid that you might be overstepping your boundaries, once again – check that you are making statements about yourself and not attempting to make those statements apply to everyone. Here’s some examples:

Instead of: “You shouldn’t say those things. It’s wrong.”

Try: “I am not comfortable sayings those things to people because I feel….”

Asking for someone to clarify what they’ve stated before you respond can also be helpful in creating understanding rather than conflict.

And finally, the easiest thing you can do is walk away.

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