The Road to Happiness is Paved with Zero Fucks
We, as humans, have a tendency to hyper-focus on details and specific situations. We give those things all of our attention, even when they don’t really deserve them, and that can, from time time, cause us to stress out about things that really don’t matter in the long run. When we’re in the thick of it, we can’t see the forest for the trees.
A good friend of mine posted a conversation he had with his 4-year-old son as a Facebook status a while back, and the wisdom his little boy gave to him that day was pretty spot on.
“Love it when my 4-year-old son gives me some perspective. On the way to school yesterday morning, we were having our usual chat. At some point, I was telling him, maybe complaining a bit about something that bothered me (it wasn’t a big deal… I can’t even remember what it was). He cut me off:
Lincoln: “Daddy. Big things… little things.”
Lincoln: “Big things, little things.”
Me: “What do you mean?”
Lincoln: “We shouldn’t make big things out of little things. Is it a big thing, or a little thing?”
Me: “It’s a little thing.”
Lincoln: “Then why are you sad?”
Me: “I’m not sad, buddy. Just annoyed.”
Lincoln: “If it’s just a little thing, it will be ok. Don’t worry, Daddy.”
When I find myself becoming overly annoyed with situations or people, I often ask myself, “Will this matter to me in 10 years?”
If the answer is, “No…” then FUCK IT. That’s right. FUCK IT. If it’s not a part of the big picture, then it doesn’t matter and it doesn’t deserve (or even require) my attention.
When you choose to give those things and those people your attention that don’t matter and don’t really require it but annoy you nevertheless, you are actively seeking out things that do not reflect back to you the happiness and joy that exists within you.
Now certainly, there are situations that deserve your attention. The key is determining which situations require your fucks and which situations do not require your fucks. You shouldn’t just go giving those fucks away for free. It’s not one of those situations in which you should make it rain, you know what I’m saying?
This great post over here called, “The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fuck” is a great starter on how to just say, “Fuck it.”
After you’ve read that, and you can come back here and tell me that you’re ready to actively choose to be happy and stop wasting your time on shit that doesn’t matter, I’ll give you one last thing.
It’s just a little mantra for you to repeat to yourself any time you feel your fucks being sucked into a vacuum of negativity.
Stop. Become aware. And then repeat:
Need some inspirational reminders to give no fucks? Here’s a whole album worth.
My first reaction to the reading was WOW. Your words captured a theme woven into my life right now. The reading has emboldened me to take back my power and inspired me to research some books, get back to meditating and provided a focus.Dina