Acceptance Is Not Tolerance

Apr 24, 2015 | Mind, Personal Development, Spirit

You’re invited to join In My Sacred Space on Facebook! It’s my new closed Facebook group for people who read my blog and like the things I post about on my Facebook page. Feel free to join me and other like-minded people. Who knows, you might have some fun ūüôā


When we believe there is something flawed about us and that those flaws need to be fixed, then¬†our ideas about how things ought to be don’t match how they really are. This is the root of¬†suffering.

You might read this and begin to think that it means you should simply learn to accept your flaws and stop trying to fix them. You would be wrong.

What I’m telling you is that you were never flawed to begin with. It is your belief that you are a flawed human being – our own insecurities – which creates behaviors that would be deemed undesirable.

I once had this conversation with a friend (you know who you are):

“Is it¬†better to accept your flaws¬†rather than to look whats wrong with you?”

“Why do you think that something that is “wrong” to begin with?

“Oh, I¬†see – I have to change my way of looking at things.”

If you still believe the thing that you are accepting is wrong, then you are not accepting it. You are tolerating it. Tolerance is not acceptance. 

acceptance

Acceptance is about accepting yourself, just as you REALLY are, instead of holding the belief that there is something inherently flawed about you. It’s not about tolerating your flaws and accepting your insecurities, it’s not about ignoring them, it’s not about convincing yourself¬†that really nasty¬†personality traits are somehow good –¬†¬†it’s about coming to the understanding that there was never anything¬†wrong with you to begin with and eliminating the insecurity.

The deeply ingrained beliefs that we are defective are our own insecurities which we have been conditioned to believe through experience and society from the time we were born.

That is what it is, at the most basic level, but then it goes up from there.

You can begin to accept others as they are, you can begin to accept situations as they are (because the root of suffering is when the reality of a situation is not how you think it ought to be).

Acceptance can go a long way to help both people and the world heal.

But I also find that many people don’t quite understand the subtlety of it, and when they apply it to the world around them – say for example, with world situations… starvation, hunger, ware – they think acceptance means that we should be complacent with these things.

I think this is because they are missing the fundamental connection between acceptance of self, and not making the realization as to how collective self-acceptance would actually eliminate all of those other problems. Because all external conflict is a reflection of internal conflict.

But they tend to look at the world from the outside in, rather than the inside out.

If I have to be specific, I would say that the cause of this type of person’s suffering is the inability to change the world they see around them. They see all of this suffering and the problems are so big, and they want to save everyone and they can’t possibly do so (once again – when how a situation actually is does not match how you think it ought to be = suffering). So in this sense, acceptance means that you need to accept the fact that you cannot save the world.

That doesn’t mean that you ignore the suffering of others (as many people often immediately accuse me of when I talk about this concept), but rather come to an understanding of how small actions, on a collective level, are what will change the world and that those small actions begin with what is inside of you.

signature

 

 

 

 

 


Got a question you want me to answer in a blog post? 

If you have a general question about spirituality, metaphysics, personal development or how those concepts apply to a specific experience or situation and you'd like me to address in a blog post, you can submit it here. When submitting your question, please be as specific as possible. If your question is in reference to a specific blog post, please include the link. 

This does not apply to questions that you would ask during a psychic reading. Please book a reading with a reputable intuitive - you can find my list of recommended people here. I also offer single card tarot readings [GET DETAILS].

 

**NOTE*** This is not the comments section. Keep scrolling! 


0 Comments

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Let’s Talk About Sex | In My Sacred Space - […] ourselves from being hurt by other people. They also protect ourselves from ourselves, because we have this perception that…

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Facebook      Pinterest      Twitter      Google Plus      Bloglovin      Instagram

most popular posts

[wpp]

My first reaction to the reading was WOW. Your words captured a theme woven into my life right now. The reading has emboldened me to take back my power and inspired me to research some books, get back to meditating and provided a focus.

Dina

New York

Pin It on Pinterest

Shares
Share This

Share This Article

Know some people who should read this? Share it now.

Shares